Guess whose back? Back again. Drainy’s back. Tell a friend. That’s right folks, I woke up the morning with the normal amount of holes in my body and now I have an extra. Bonus!!! I’ll back up. Remember the seroma I’ve been talking about? It’s the buildup of fluid under my armpit where they removed…
Month: July 2016
Hi, How Are You?
My dad had an incredible sense of humor. It wasn’t something he wore on the outside, it was more like a lil gift you received if you were able to crack the code of his language and delivery. He had the type of clever, dry wit that zings you when you least expect it. One…
License To Chill
What a wild 24 hours it has been. One of my nearest, dearest, oldest, friends, Miranda, flew into town yesterday morning to see me for a few days before chemo and then accompany me there tomorrow (Tuesday the 26th). We decided to use some connections and stay the night downtown at the Waldorf Astoria. We…
Bibbity Bloggity Boobs
Cinderella. We all know the story. She was relegated to the life of a handmaiden after her father died and her evil stepmother took over the house, making her two wretched daughters the ‘fair maidens’ of the household. Cindy had a serendipitous encounter with Prince Charming and some mice. A Fairy Godmother got involved, and poof!…
House Arrest
So I just wanted to take a minute to say how nice it has been meeting and knowing all of you. I will be hibernating in my house for the next 6 months so, BYEEEE! I gotta say, I am shocked by how intensely baldness has hit me. At the risk of sounding horribly vain,…
Molting
It started yesterday. I noticed a certain unnamed subsection of my body hair was making a mass exodus. Since it wasn’t on my head, it was amusing. Many Brazilian bikini wax jokes ensued. This morning I ran my hands through my hair and there it was, a clump. I have been waiting for this day…
Mic Drop Minivan
I know what you are thinking. Could this chick get any sexier? Yes, yes I can. I have a minivan. BOOM. Normally when I emerge from the van-of-mini, I look just like every other suburban mom. But now that I look like Krusty the Clown, I am receiving quite a few sideways glances. I wrote…
Dear Mr. Hemsley UPDATE
BEHOLD THE POWER OF SOCIAL MEDIA————— So I won. Why isn’t there an exclamation point after that, you wonder? Because I won. I get a fancy, human hair wig. Don’t get me wrong. I am excited and very, very proud that my persistence and communication worked. I have built myself a platform from which I wield…
Twilight Sparkle
When I was a little girl I was obsessed with My Little Ponies. These were not the MLPs of today, who are slender, beautiful and sassy. My ponies were chubby, cute and lovable. I am sort of embarrassed to admit this, but at the height of my ponydom, I had 73 of these little plastic, equine toys….
Pop Pop Fizz
Chapter 1: Pop I slept last night! It wasn’t the sleep of my dreams (see what I did there?), but all things considered, it was pretty good. I woke up feeling not only human, but sort of normal. I languished in bed for a while listening to my kids’ cheery voices playing some sort of…
Top Ten
Tonight’s Top Ten Category is: Top 10 Exciting Chemo Side Effects So Far Number 10: Bone Pain- Most likely from the Neulasta shot meant to bolster white blood cell production. Adult growing pains never felt so horrible! Number 9: Itchy Scalp- Instead of enjoying your hair for the last few days you have it, why not…
grancerblog 