Once upon a time there was a hairless woman who needed to have the sandpaper-like tents removed from her body, along with a port device in her arm. We shall call her Tinkerboobs. 

Tink showed up at the hospital early in the morning and started getting prepped for surgery. She met her nurses Carly and Steve, her nurse anesthetist Diane and her female anesthesiologist, Dr. Silk.

The plastic surgeon, Dr. Sisco, came in and drew purple Sharpie circles all over her body.

What comes next is a blur. Wheeled back into surgery and tuning out when the big mask was placed over her face.

Coming to, Tinkerboobs finds herself in a large room filled with other recovering people. The sounds of a child wailing disturb her. Her throat hurts like crazy from the intubation tube and she constantly asks the kind nurse for ice chips.

More pain meds are pushed through her tubing and she floats in and out of consciousness, as the child continues to cry.

Eventually Tink is wheeled into her lovely, private recovery room where her mom and sister await. She even has a special visit from her father-in-law and husband, who had just had his own ‘procedure’ done the same morning (✂️). 

Pain starts to seep in, but meds are given very liberally.

About 7 hours after surgery, Tink wanted to go home. Many instructions are given on wound and home care and off we went into the very rainy day.

Getting home to mom’s house is another blur. After a rest, Tink wakes up in pain, gurl.

Tink has 6 wounds. The two large incisions under each breast, the incision on the arm, where the port came out, and three liposuction wounds on her belly where fat was harvested to fill holes in the breast area. 

Tink sleeps a lot that first day and only gets up to use the bathroom, which is often, as her throat still hurts like crazy and the only thing that helps is constantly sipping cold water.

With an ice pack wrapped around her arm, she lays as flat and motionless as possible. Any movement is painful, as there are wounds everywhere, from the hips up. 

Tink has yet to see her new breasts. That can wait. For now, she just wants to medicate and sleep some of the pain off.

Thank you all for thinking of Tinkerboobs as she heads through yet another rough patch.

But Tinkerboobs is strong and will get through this like she always does, with class and perseverance.