Twenty Twenty Two-mer

I have lost the ability to see things in terms of years. When you are cancery, or perhaps when you are walking through any difficult patch of life, time is not measured in long swaths. It is measured in, ‘bitch, am I going to make it through the next hour?!’ 2016 taught me many things,…

Greg

The flurry of tests, scans & appointments is in full swing. A few days ago my sister took me to the hospital for a CT scan from my pubic bone to my neck to look for distant metastases. This involved getting there 2 hours early to pick up ‘the drink.’ Over the course of the…

AGAIN

Christmas, 2021. At the age of 41, I was diagnosed with breast cancer for the second time (pause for hysterical laughter–she’s kidding right?) Two weeks ago, I saw my oncologist for a regular appointment. She did an exam, as she always does. She found a lump on my cancerous side. I had an ultrasound the…

5 Years

5 years ago today I was diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma breast cancer. It seems both a billion years ago and like yesterday. As time has passed some of the details have started to fade. I can’t remember the names of certain tests or drugs, the post-op rules or even the names of important players….

North Korea, South China Sea, Breast Cancer

What would you think, if you recently had chemotherapy as a breast cancer treatment and you woke up to these headlines? Allow me to tell you what I thought. FUUUUCCCKKKKKK. I mean, yeah science!, but also, (mad face). Upon reading the many articles and trying to digest the evidence-based conclusions, I felt some unexpected reactions….

Transparent

About a week after my final chemo, I was contacted by a filmmaker named Rachel Pikelny. She was looking for someone to follow as a documentary film subject, someone who was finishing active treatment for breast cancer and moving on to what so many refer to as, ‘life back to normal’. The rest is history….

The DL on the DL

Mom, please stop reading right now. My father-in-law, I’m serious, this is not for your eyes. Anyone at all who doesn’t want to hear details about the goings on in my still functioning (barely) lady bits, this where where you exit the blog, stage left. BYE!!!! Here goes- A couple of technical things you should…

Is it…?

They say that if your cancer is going to recur or metastasize it is most likely to happen in the 12 months after you finish initial treatment. So I finished chemo on September 13, 2016. I am going to go with that date as the day my 1 year stopwatch started ticking. The first few…

A Hair Day

I am already laughing at the really bad joke I am about to tell. I really do entertain myself. I think I could be okay in a locked, padded room for a few days. It might feel like a vacation. Anyway, here goes. I am having a hair day! Not a good hair day, not…

Follicular Folly

Okay, I realize that a haircut was probably slightly premature, but I am desperate to do anything that feels non-cancery. My hair was starting to grow over my ears and the nape of my neck was looking sloppy. This was all I needed to warrant a visit to the salon. The haircut itself took approximately…

Unmentionables

Though it may not seem like it, due to my ‘openness’ in this blog, there are a few topics that I have wanted to write about, but haven’t felt entirely comfortable doing. Bad (or good?) news for you, I am not going to write about them today either. These topics all center around the female…

The Wall 

It’s happening right now. I reached the place I have heard about from so many who came before me. I hit the post-treatment wall. I will tell you about what happened, but note that the trigger is somewhat irrelevant. It doesn’t really matter what makes you hit the wall, it just matters that it happened….